And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
