How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
