keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
