She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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