I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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