Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
