We're like a lot better than the average bears
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize