how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
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