I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
love makes seman taste better
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I see more hoeing in ur future
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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