6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I just want nice things and good sex
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
