I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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