I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
