remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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