Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
