I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
