who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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