At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
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Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
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Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
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