Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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