did you get engaged???
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize