i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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