I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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