her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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