hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
