Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome

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  (610): the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome http://tfl.nu/8iag
  Replies (4) Good night (1636) Bad night (613)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?

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  (404): I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of? http://tfl.nu/2d4m
  Replies (21) Good night (728) Bad night (5282)
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  (845): View more from New York

  beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween

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  (845): beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween http://tfl.nu/oes5
  Replies (26) Good night (5863) Bad night (548)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.

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  (519): Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it. http://tfl.nu/0omt
  Replies (3) Good night (3960) Bad night (943)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described

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  (405): Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described http://tfl.nu/ywvl
  Replies (7) Good night (1794) Bad night (928)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata

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  (313): Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata http://tfl.nu/0yl6
  Replies (5) Good night (2369) Bad night (689)
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  (949): View more from California

  I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.

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  (949): I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer. http://tfl.nu/vxsa
  Replies (4) Good night (724) Bad night (1050)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.

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  (678): I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos. http://tfl.nu/fnmm
  Replies (7) Good night (1025) Bad night (520)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.

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  (801): The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting. http://tfl.nu/bouz
  Replies (3) Good night (1005) Bad night (538)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".

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  (920): watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro". http://tfl.nu/wzks
  Replies (9) Good night (918) Bad night (1104)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Hamster emergency. Can u come in here

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  (330): Hamster emergency. Can u come in here http://tfl.nu/n98l
  Replies (8) Good night (448) Bad night (735)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow

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  (720): This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow http://tfl.nu/n4ws
  Replies (2) Good night (538) Bad night (349)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"

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  (651): these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck" http://tfl.nu/ykzg
  Replies (3) Good night (602) Bad night (399)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"

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  (757): And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!" http://tfl.nu/qrns
  Replies (2) Good night (640) Bad night (307)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.

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  (330): Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now. http://tfl.nu/qkkr
  Replies (4) Good night (347) Bad night (798)

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