It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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