He disabled his match.com account in front of me
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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