Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
