You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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