the new term for farting is butt boxing.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize
