I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I have tasted many bathrooms
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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