god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
