I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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