dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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