So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I hate your face
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize