the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
