Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
