Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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