but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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