just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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