This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
