It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Randomize
