Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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