i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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