WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
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Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
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He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
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