Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
