She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
