You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
