he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
