How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
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constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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