'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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