Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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