I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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